Yep. I'd swap her. I took care of her from my childhood through last year after my own diagnosis of a connective tissue disease. Through her addiction...and her cancer treatment (and her recovery). Nothing I did was ever enough. I don't miss her a bit, but with that said, it would be nice to have a parent who is proud. I saw my Aunt G a few years ago (she helped care for me at pivotal moments). She was wowed when I showed her my textbook credits. "Did you EVER think you'd come this far?" (It was asked in amazement.)